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July 11, 2011

FCUK a “Friend Zone”

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Written by: Jack Tha Kid
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Friend Zone
Random thoughts of Tha Kid the other day led to a discussion with the boys about the dreaded and as far as I am concerned, non-existent friend zone phenomena.  I was sitting sipping on a Heineken listening to what I thought were men’s men, talking shit in my ear that they had entered the friend zone with their respective crushes…  To that I called bullshit! Ain’t no damn thing as a friend zone.  As always, introspective and analytical, Tha Kid has to break this BS down in steps to explain that if you in that F’n so called friend zone its cause you were never in the possible zone to start with.

 

  1. First off, if you meet someone you like and ask them out, they better say yes to the hangout/date offer or guess what dude?  You’re in that fucking friend-zone already.  Not cause of anything you did, but instead cause she just isn’t feeling you like that from the jump.
  2. Secondly, if your acting like her friend… Pause…  don’t act like her friend.  It’s cool to be friends with a chick, but once you stop flirty touching, or hanging out solo on occasion, you’re in the shit.
  3. Third, dudes need to stop believing the hype that women are so much more emotional than our horny asses. They want the slam just as much; only difference is that we were lucky enough to be on the side of the societal fence where bulk and numbers of conquests actually is a positive.  We got to understand that once a woman has given up the goods to you, no matter how many times you slam, you still count as one and for them.  Society has deemed, the lower the number the better.  Don’t get it twisted though, they some horny, freaky ass mutha fuckers!  That being said, with all the possible respect you have in your bones, treat them as freaks from time to time and results will be better.
  4. Fourth and finally, if she is attracted to you and you know this.  Then don’t worry homeboy, she may not want anything with you at the moment or ever, but best believe you aint in no damn friend zone as long as you continue to flirt and don’t get shy with your hands and eyes.  Treat them like a target of your desires and they remain one.  Ultimately you want that bit of awkwardness when you are with her at all times.  Get too comfortable and you might as well be her brother; thus you loose the spark or any potential of it.

Bottom line is this.  You’ve probably got enough fucking friends already, so don’t go into a date or a meet with a girl acting as if you got to be some nice dude to make her like you.  She either already likes you or she don’t either way by the time you know a girl enough, she already made her damn mind up whether it’s even possible for her clothes to come off for you a long time ago… probably within minutes off meeting you.

Trust Tha Kid on this one.  If you think you are in a friend zone its cause you she just don’t feel you and if you aren’t them by all means, don’t bottle up the savage beast you know you are.  Let her know that you aim to please her in all ways.  Feel me fellas…

Another pearl dropped by Tha Kid… were you listening?

That’s my take, love it or hate, ain’t gonna change it!  Deuces!!

Follow me on Twitter: @Tha_Kid

 



About the Author

Jack Tha Kid
Jack Richards, or Tha Kid as he is affectionately known; or maybe not… Either way, this man has some strong opinions about everything there is to be said when it comes to relationships, sex and style.  Always willing to give his advice to those willing and able to listen, he is an interesting and surely controversial Mind of Zadishe at www.jackthakid.com and columnist at www.whatblackmenwant.com.




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