A few months ago, about the time spring began to bloom, I noticed a beautiful sister walking in my direction. She wore a lovely turquoise sundress with matching heels and just enough jewelry to complement her outfit without looking over-accessorized. The way that this young lady carried herself was just as attractive as her appearance. She had the kind of walk that makes men from 15 to 115 stop to admire her until she is out of sight. Head held high, eyes wide open and hips singing a song sweeter than the blue birds in the trees. I am not ashamed to say, I was definitely captivated.
By now I know you’re wondering: What was the body like? Janet? Nope. Beyonce? Nah. Kim K? Definitely not. If I had to compare her to a celebrity, it would have to be Jill Scott, pre-weight loss. As she faded into my memory, I remember wondering “how many men would be attracted to her, but never act on it simply because she is a plus-sized female?”
A few days ago I was chatting online with a female acquaintance when she hit me with a request I really didn’t see coming. “Write an article about why men are attracted to famous full-figured women like Jill Scott and Queen Latifah, but not regular women.” Her request took me back to that very spring day that I had buried somewhere in the cobwebs of my mind.
The answer is quite simple– men who are attracted to, yet do not date full-figured women are ignorant and afraid. They have simply bought into pop culture’s illusional standard of beauty and cling to it instead of thinking for themselves. That’s a blanket statement, and a rather strong one. I usually don’t like blanket statements, but it’s the only answer.
Standards of beauty have been around as long as humanity, and will continue to be. They vary from culture to culture and sometimes even region to region. The Southeast region of the US is probably the most ‘full-figured friendly’ region of the continent. I’ve had several women tell me that what is considered “plump” back home is the norm or even viewed as “a little thin” in the South. This is not to say all Southern men are attracted to full-figured or “plus-size women” but I get the feeling it’s generally less of an issue.
The young lady that asked me to discuss this issue happens to hail from California, home of Hollywood. Watch a couple of movies and it becomes clear that Hollywood’s definition of beauty emphasizes unrealistically thin body shapes for women. Even “Voluptuous Vixens” like Beyonce and Kim K have body shapes most women may not even achieve with hours of exercise and dieting.
Men and women are all constantly exposed to a standard of feminine beauty that is unrealistic and often unhealthy. This obsession with being thin has caused millions of beautiful women to feel unattractive and millions of men to overlook and ignore even their own attraction to women simply because they are afraid of what society will think of them.
Please don’t misunderstand me, I’m not saying you’re shallow or brainwashed if you prefer slender women over full-figured women. All I want you to do is ask yourself if you prefer a certain body type over another because that’s what you like or because you think it’s what you’re “supposed” to like. Be sure that you own your standard of beauty instead of simply accepting what is being imposed upon you.
Missed my last post? Do We Hate Our Women?