So after my post making the case for men to date a mature woman, I had to ask why I found myself attracted to older women. After a lot of soul searching and thinking, I realized that what I am actually attracted to are women who carry themselves in a “lady-like” fashion.
Dictionary.com defines a lady as a woman who is refined, polite and well spoken. You don’t have to be a duchess or have gone to charm school, just know how to put together a coherent sentence and conduct yourself with class. Not a lot to ask, right? You would think so, but based on my observations, it’s getting increasingly difficult to meet a true Lady under the age of thirty.
Aside from the obvious things like going out of the house dressed like a backup dancer for Rihanna, there are lots of little things that I notice on a day-to-day basis that make me scratch my head. Things like when I hold a door for a female and she doesn’t even acknowledge my presence. Things like failing to make eye contact when a man is actually trying to look them in their eyes.
How to cross their legs when wearing a skirt. How to hold a conversation that didn’t include the use of profanity in every other sentence. How to dress in a manner that leaves something to the imagination. Things that separate a bride from a booty call.
Somewhere along the line, the ball was dropped. There could be several reasons. As the single mother became the rule and not the exception in the black community, they’ve had less time to spend nurturing and passing on their values to their children. Add to that the fact that many of today’s mothers are still in or barely out of their teen years. And lest we forget, we’ve seen a huge backlash on traditional gender roles in the past fifty or so years. It’s like no one wants to tell young girls there are certain activities that ladies do not engage in.
There is nothing sexier than a woman who can sit and have a conversation about everything from the upcoming presidential race to the latest mixtapes. There’s nothing better than finding a woman who you feel comfortable bringing around both your boys and your mother.
But hey, in a world where Nikki Minaj is arguably a bigger role model for young women than Michelle Obama, maybe I’m asking for too much, too soon. It seems as though many young women of today are developing physically at a much quicker rate than they are mentally. As they navigate through life, I suspect that they too will begin to carry themselves in a manner that is more befitting of a Lady. Until then, the mature woman is looking pretty damned good! Wouldn’t you agree?
Missed my last post: The Case for the Mature Woman