So she is your one and only huh?! Stop being a clown and man up! Tha Kid is about to delve into a serious issue today that afflicts not only men but woman alike. That issue is the dreaded… Wait for it… Wait for it… Oneitis! Some of you may be saying to yourself, what the hell is Tha Kid talking about now? Is this another one of his oh so crazy philosophies and theories on dating? Well… actually… yeah it is. But here is the great thing about Tha Kid and his outlandish theories; They are right! I would feel wrong to not share with the world the gift I have been granted, namely, the ability to see through the bullshit and spit it out for those who don’t want to. Ok, that is probably just about enough patting myself on the back for now, onto the Oneitis issue.
Oneitis is a disease that I assume everyone has been burdened with from time to time. It is a lot like the flu I guess, it never truly goes away, but if you are vigilant and stay clean and alert you contract it less often. When someone does contract Oneitis all they see is the one person that is their “one and only” or “soul mate” or “perfect match”. Of course once over this crush or love spell, we look back on it and say, “what the fuck was I thinking/doing all that shit for her.” Even Tha Kid himself has had his moments of Oneitis and had to slap myself in the face hard to get out of it.
When crushing on someone, we tend to build that person up to be perfect, flawless, no matter what our friends or our brain is telling us about the blemishes of that person. The high of thinking you will, or could possibly be with this person totally masks every pimple, wart or third eye they may have. To be clear, Oneitis does at times end up working out very well and once married, Oneitis is a great disease to have indeed. The strain of Oneitis I am talking about today is the one when you and the person of your desires are both non committed to anything passed dating. This strand can take years from your life and the joy out of your soul. If you are looking for a sexual partner or girlfriend/boyfriend, then do that, but not at the risk of narrowing your choices to 1 in 6,750,000,000 people in the world. Look at that number again and think of how asinine that really is.
Now to be rid of Oneitis isn’t as easy as drinking some orange juice and taking some antibiotics; for Oneitis you need dedication and discipline. The trap of Oneitis is that is uses one of the most powerful laws of attraction against us. The law that states, if we can’t have it, we want it and if it is a chase, we will chase it to the end of the world if we think we have a chance. If we don’t think we have a chance we will convince ourselves we do, and then chase it to the end of the earth. You digging what I’m saying right now. We decide we want what we want and then become obsessed with it; in this case a person. The problem with Oneitis, while all romantic and shit to think that one person is your soul mate, is that the person is not your fucking soul mate dude.
So here is how you get out of Oneitis in 3 steps:
- Look at the person you are obsessed with and literally force yourself to find 5 flaws they have, and if you are having a hard time doing that then ask a friend and don’t get mad when they give you the truth.
- Ask yourself, why are you really obsessed with this person? For what reason? And if you did actually end up in a relationship with them, would it really last or was it all about the chase?
- Finally, date other people for fucks sake… go out, date, and have crazy wild sex with any and every woman you can. I promise that within a week or two you will start to understand the folly of your ways.
To wrap it up. If you are not married or in a committed relationship with a woman and you are not dating anyone but one person, you are showing the symptoms of Oneitis, and need to get healthy. Women love men who can attract and are adored by other women; so that woman you are chasing down, will more than likely be on your dick if she knew you had many options. The only exception to this rule of course is my homeboy Pepe Le Pew who has the worst case of Oneitis on record, but is so gangsta about it, he makes the damn disease look cool and shit. Anyways…
There is much more to this story and this disease, this is simply an editorial piece and not a thesis however, so I digress.
Oh on a final note, Fellas, it is a great thing when all the Ladies have a case of Oneitis and you are the crush… I got that medicine for you girls. Holla!
My last post: Women; Stop Lying about What you Want